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For Now It Will Last But Not Forever

こんにちは!やまねこです! Hello! I'm やまねこ!

Friday, November 21, 2014

Part 1

Child Abandonment.

This issue is something which is very close to me. Something which I can greatly relate to and I think sharing it out to the public would help myself and those who are facing the same problem as I did. I grew up with a caretaker hired by my parents. I was under her care for almost 16 years alongside with my sisters. 


My parents divorced when I was 15. I knew it was coming that time. It didn't really bother me much emotionally as I was very used to their fights. We all were, my sisters too. I was the middle-child and believed to have suffered from this infamous middle-child syndrome. I was mostly emotionally neglected and I was pretty much of an attention seeker. I tried doing well academically as well as in other extra co-curricular activities. In spite of all the effort I put in and the achievements I've made, there is just no fate between both of my parents and me. They rarely took notice of me.I was just a kid but I clearly know what bias meant. I comfort myself often by trying to stay as optimistic as I can. I started comparing my life with those who are much more unfortunate than me, yet I still feel the emptiness in me.Contradictions came in. I have a good life, with all the basic needs I have but emotional support is just something I lack of. The attention from your family. The love of a mother. A void that I desperately tried to fill but the guilt of being a burden to others gushes into my bloodstream. On and off, on and off. As I grew up, I learned to be independent which I think it is an advantage to me. I did well in school, I have friends and school life was normal. I got adapted to the way of living with this void. I moved forward. Well, at least that is what I thought. 


When I turned 16, things started to change. 


Posted by keetzesan at 2:09 PM
Labels: Abandonment, Daily life story (crappy ones), Middle-child, Psychology

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